Paris Hilton, known for her superior intellect and keen mental facilities, will be stopping off at Harvard next month during her promotional tour for The Hottie and the Nottie to receive the Hasty Pudding Club's prestigious "Woman of the Year" award.

So... Ivy League just ain't what it used it be, huh? I heard the next big plans for the institution is to change its name from "Harvard University" to "Carl's Junior presents Harvard University sponsored by Pepsi." Got a nice ring to it, don't you think? Oh yeah, and from here on out Harvard diplomas will come with complimentary 20% off coupons for Best Buy as well as a voucher for a free strawberry margarita from Applebee's -- to really give those grads the head start they need!